Wednesday, April 18, 2018

It's allergy season...for teenagers

I know it is Spring: My car is covered in hyper-yellow pollen and my son and I have started to take our allergy medicine more seriously than in the other months. I used to think that he wasn't going to develop allergies, but a quick glance at his puffy eyes and runny nose has me breaking out the children's medicine so he can dry up and get back to bike rides.


My son is at a fun age. It's one where he is starting to wonder if our family is like other families, but one in which he still likes spending time with my husband and I. That means a lot to us. We love the game nights, his company on weekend errands and all the connective moments in between. I try to stay fully present for those moments, because I know they will not last forever.

I know that one day my son will become allergic to me.

Not quite allergic in the way we are with Spring now, but allergic in the sense that almost everything I do will irritate him. While this article is a poignant reminder of why the search for our own identity is difficult for all parties involved to go through, it is still hard to think about that future. Yes, my son will be trying to figure out which values he will take forward into his life and which ones he will reject. And I get that. But being rejected is never easy.

"Childhood is when we learn how to act in adulthood," my son says as he brushes his hair in the bathroom. Did I teach him that? It sounds like something I would say, and it is definitely true, but it sounds harsh. "Childhood is also when we learn what makes us happy," I tell him. I hope that message sinks in as well. He smiles and gives me a kiss and asks me to play UNO.

Of course I say yes. I say yes and hopes he remembers that when he is out there finding himself as a teenager, I will still love him. And I will still want to play UNO.

What values of your parents did you want to reject when you became a teenager? Share with me in the comments.

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